Saturday, July 18, 2009

my gigantic love analogy

I was the Titanic and he was my iceberg.

I use this analogy not to convey that I didn't know it was coming, he sunk me anyway, but because I'm rather large like a boat, and he's rather hidden like the bottom 90% of a berg.


yup
that is all.

Tuesday, July 14, 2009

Where Did You Go Joe Demagio?

So Senior year...
wow, I'm embarking upon a new year and have expectations, of what height I'm completely unaware, and am utterly tired of what I do to myself.

I need change, I need revitalization, I need strength, I need balance, I need faith.
Sure, I'm into music heavily. Sure, I have long, flowing, Hippie hair. Sure, I'm vegetarian. Sure, I love nature and animals. Sure, I care about the environment. Sure, I feel like a badass activist on occasion. Sure, I wanna make a change in the world.
But this is all so stereotypical. I don't want to be judged, or judge others. But it happens and we all do it. But that still doesn't excuse it. But even though wanna give myself to a greater purpose, currently I have not the means, nor the logic.
I wear my heart on my sleeve. I cry too easy. I pretend things are better than they are. I ask myself why I am the way I am. I can't honestly answer it. I try to give some petty things up. I fail at it. I want peace and love, freedom and passion. I want Taco Bell right now. I know that was random.
I feel like a fraud sometimes. I feel like I can't go on sometimes. I feel like a psycho sometimes. I feel like I have no direction sometimes. I feel the need to scream and pour my heart out sometimes. I feel like nothing can get any worse sometimes. I feel indescribably surrounded by amazingly inspired people sometimes. I feel inadequate sometimes. I feel hyper and overly enthusiastic sometimes. I feel happy sometimes.

soul-searching...status:in process of
finding love...status:dormant
persuing dreams...status:will take a while

Wednesday, July 1, 2009

mother superior jumped the gun

so my 9 yr old niece showed signs of racism today

setting:
Me, Maxine, Erin (5), Katie (9) and her dad Nathan at a Mexican resturaunt

dialougue:
Max- "Erin's had 4 boyfriends since the age of two"
Erin-"Alfredo is my fiance, he just moved to Mexico."
Katie-"He's Mexican?"
Maxine- "Yeah, they were upper middle class and Alfredo's dad got a better job offer back in Mexico."
Katie-"WHO WOULD LIKE A MEXICAN?"



I was FLOORED!

I can't believe she's only nine and she thinks racial differences are a plague.
I don't even know what to say

another situation
Erin was in daycare age 3 and she "loved" this boy ChuChu, a black boy from Kenya.
they were boyfriend/girlfriend and it was sweet.
one day Erin gets home and Max asks her if she and ChuChu are still in love and she said no because "someone told [her] that [she] shouldn't like him cause he's brown"

I really don't have any opinion of racists...you're gonna be who you're gonna be. But to teach your child at a young age that skin color is a difference to be frowned upon...come on people!