these days we go to waste like wine

ahh to avoid the gushy matters of life-some startling self revelations I'm not too happy about-I'd like to take this time to be excited for awesome things in the work

1.I'm brave! not about most things, but in this one case [:
2.4 months till I'm 18 and can get out of here!
3.5 months till graduation and the beginning of the best summer ever
4.my future's looking bright
5.my heart is in a pretty grand place at the moment

finally [:

This was kinda short
umm, but I'm in a list-making mood so current addictions:
1.Green Tea (per as usual)
2.Tumlbr and Weheartit
3.Television (only for the break though then I won't have time)
4.Eos lipbalm (completely organic, I die)
5.making origami hearts (would you like one?)

things my slacker alter ego needs to do this week rather than indulge in addiction #s 2&3:
1.finish my Columbia app (by Jan 4th!!!)
2.attempt this physics test (grrr)
3.do my calculus final (grrr repeated)
4.go see my mom and the my little sister (Cleveland one day, Jefferson the next)
5.go shopping (cause I haven't been in a while and need to girl fun)

shut your eyes, bury me in surprise

Ohhhh far be it for me to have a break from school without getting sick, sitting on the couch becoming re-obsessed with certain tv shows, with tissues and green tea, crying about things no one even notices.
I feel like I should be doing something much more proactive than sitting on my ass crying over the stupid decisions television characters make, ha. Well too bad. I already cleaned the house in its entirety and now have nothing else to do. So, I will continue to sob every time something comes in between Ross and Rachel, Lucas and Peyton, Ray J and Luscious (even though I want Ray J for myself-that hunk of dark chocolate haha jk, but really.) And music? Don't get me started. The Freshman by the Verve Pipe? Rivers of tears. Backstreet Boys? tearrrrrsssss.
Ahhh I'm too emotional. But oh man, I had an amazing time at Rach's party. Just as I was thinking I was gonna leave without playing truth or dare, we played. My initial dare was too weird and my replacement dare was supposed to be harder, but I kinda enjoyed it [: Anyway, it was fun getting together again and Nick was there-miss that boy! Outside of Rach's house was pretty nice as well, though I wish I had be a little more brave.
Christmas plans-was supposed to go to my mom's with my sister, Jan and dad. Apparently I can't do that now, so I'm a bit miffed, but oh well, I'll deal.
Yup, that's about it for now, I'm gonna go cry over Ghost Wisperer haha.

My thermostat lies. It says its 75 degrees. It feels like 7.

you can rob me of my sight and you can poison my bloodstream,

but as long as I can dream then life is worth living-Brett Dennen

I'm rather full of frustration, sick of being stressed out, and longing for solutions. But hey, everyone has problems, why are mine any different?
So I'll just ramble on about the present and dive into the future as it comes.
in the mean time, why don't you make my day and answer these [:

who are you, what's our relationship:
how and where did we meet:
how long have you known me:
tell me one good thing about myself:
when you first saw me what was your impression:
my favorite band at the moment:
colour eyes:
do i have any siblings:
do you or have you ever had a crush on me:
describe me in 3 words:
name 5 things i love:
how would you describe me to someone:
would you ever date me:
tell me one thing you've always wanted to say but never did:
what do you like most about me:
if we could spend a day together what would we do:
do you think we will be friends for at least 3 or 4 more years:
Give me a nickname and explain why you picked it.
What do you think my weakness is?
Do you think I'll get married?
What makes me happy?
What makes me sad?
What reminds you of me?
If you could give me anything what would it be?
When's the last time you saw me?
Do you think our friendship is getting stronger/weaker/or staying the same?
Do you feel that you could talk to me about anything and I would listen?
If I was an ice cream flavor, which would I be and why?
What song (if any) reminds you of me?
If you could change one thing about me, what would it be?
Do I cross your mind at least 1 time a day?
If you could change one thing about our relationship past present and future what would it be?

Woot, totally got my first acceptance letter. It's from Mercer, which wasn't my first choice, but it's still exciting. Billie's going there so if I do decide to go there I've got myself a roomie [:
Nonetheless, one down, four to go!

I'm also terribly excited for Christmas break. Even though I'm not having Christmas at my house, Rog is letting me go hang out with "people" (Holly, Jan, my dad and mom.) It'll be our first Christmas together since I was 3, I guess. Ahh party at RP's as well, should be a smashing good time [:
So basically my to-do list until break is as follows:
group project for Durbin's
annotated bib and position paper for Kreiger
derivative test in Calc yikes!!
get teacher recommendation sheets out
buy gifts!!

so, not bad I'd say. Feeling pretty good!

I took a walk around the world to ease my troubled mind.

ahhhh Kryptonite will most likely always be my favorite song, even though 3 Doors Down isn't my favorite band...just saying. Umm there's not really a set reason for this except it's a down day in multimedia and my blog stalker asked for a fresh entry to creep on [:
Oh, I've got something. We had to read a Freud essay in AP and I've been trying to interpret my dreams seeing as though for the past week they've been insane in the membrane (ha I've been on a roll with puns lately.) Most of them have been related to fears or concerns I've had during the day. Yesterday I found out that *Timmy Smalls had talked to *Johnny O'Doyle about something kinda private and I was all worried about it. Well, last night I dreamed O'Doyle barged into my class and ravished my binder, taking personal notes between me and a friend concerning various personal matters including ones pertaining to O'Doyle himself. Coincidence? Or was it Freud's dream convenience of the subconscious? I actually had a semi-segregated dream too which really doesn't relate to the fears/concerns idea I had earlier. Anyway, I dreamed with all white people (O'Doyle, no doubt, was present.) I woke up around 5:30 and fell back asleep to dream of all black people, except myself. In that dream I was Ray J's girlfriend...innnnnteresting dream there. Oh and someone ended up getting cut ha. So dreams...they're quirky and I'd really love to learn more about interpretation, cause I wanna make some sense out of this chaos. But then again, are dreams ever really meant to be interpreted fully? Doesn't that take the whimsical nature of a dream away from it? I kinda think we dream to deal with the issues and they contain all the static details and crazy comic reliefs in effort to make it less stressful, yeah, I'm gonna go with that.
*Names changed to mask my embarrassment, ha